Now having read the post, and considering what is happening in life now, I crave for what people say is normal. I wish I had followed the “normal” path. I wish I have not been hatke (hindi).
I wish I just was not fighting each day to prove. I don’t even know now what I want to prove to whom! To prove to me that life is worth living?!?
The last few days/weeks have been making me think I should go back and probably start somewhere in high school to change the route I had taken…..gone the way most of my peers went taking up either engineering or medicine. Fine I didn’t then, may be I must have stuck to my major & went on to do my post graduation. – Pointless thoughts I know!!!
I guess in all, I wish I had never married especially the way I did & stuck to my career path then. Yes, I would not have had A!!! May be he is better off without me who right now is feeling like I have failed in every single thing and I am tired, exhausted.
I wish for a normal life. A boring life - so be it. I wish to get off the roller coaster. I feel sick of it. I do not want to be an outlier.
I know that even as I pen all this down, I am also thinking more off the ordinary for the problems I am having in life right now. Wondering what is in store and throwing my hands up saying I cannot take anything any more!
Hope A has a normal life at least as he grows up. Methinks he has enough of not being normal!!