Of late, I have been wondering how one is so easily judgmental. It does not matter that all the facts are not known. From the limited knowledge, one just assumes and makes an opinion of another person. So much so, uses phrases like “I hate”.
I personally have always felt that “hate” is a very strong word. I don’t think I have ever hated anyone so far. Hope I never do. To every person, there are two sides. Condemning one because of what one hears is pretty extreme. I try see the goodness in most people. If I don’t know the person well enough, I just would hope that one has a reason for what one does.
There are many who say “oh you must so hate P”. I want to say here that – no, I don’t hate him. I don’t love him but that does not mean I hate him. We had our differences. I thought we were sorting them out. For reasons known to him, he decided to call it quits despite having a kid. He, according to most of us, has made a bad choice. According to him, it is right. Only time can tell. Do I need to hate him? I don’t like the consequences of the choices he made on my life. I am left to pick up pieces that sometimes don’t even exist.
The worst part of it all, is being judged. I am told I must not care. Repeatedly I say that it hits you hard at times. All these negative vibes. The ranting or the crying does not necessarily mean you don’t have a grip about the situation. It does not mean that you are weak or not so strong!
Being told that there are people who are worse off than you does not make your pain go away. One could feel sorry for the other person it still does not make your troubles/worries disappear. I just feel it is mean to think “Oh I am better off than the other person whose troubles seem worse!” Each plays with the cards one is dealt with in his/her way. Advice welcome; whether it is suitable or not is for that person who is going through the situation to decide. Yelling or swearing or comparing does not help in any way. Percentages of who are worse off than you also brings forward who are better off than you – right? So, instead of feeling supposedly better, one might feel worse too!
It just boils down to how one gets so judgemental. Please do not unless you know every bit of the story from all angles. Do not decide to hate a person from what one hears. It is better not to have an opinion than to form the wrong ones. Am not going to say don’t hate , spread love. Though a little tolerance does go a long way. After all we are all here for this lifetime. Why not make it pleasant for all those around us?
On the personal front, despite my rants; I am trying my damnedest to get somewhere. I still believe in love. I hope to write about more happy and positive happenings that I & A experience.