Depression – What not to say?

I had written this and saved in drafts for quite a while (I think it is almost a year now!!) Was cleaning up the drafts folder deleting posts that did not seem relevant now. When I read this one, I felt like it still fits absolutely. Quite apt even now! Right now actually!! 😦

I came across this page…

Worst Things to Say to Someone Who Is Depressed

Have heard almost every sentence on that list! 🙂

I know everyone means well…yet! some of those statements hurt really bad. I understand that being on the other side. Seeing a loved one go through hell is sheer hell by itself. 

What would I expect someone to tell me when I feel low? I don’t know…it really depends on the circumstances. I just know that I have all my well wishers. I might have alienated some with my attitude when some one consoles me with one of those many (really really exhaustive!!) phrases. 

I once read this list when I was in one of my highs (emotional/mental only 😉 ) I realised there is not much left to say to some one depressed at all. 

I don’t know the right things. I probably have done a lot of faux-pas either having said one of those myself or reacted harshly to some one who did that to me.

This is truly a random rumination. Seeking answers. Throwing up questions. Doubt if I ever will find anything at all I seek in life! 😦

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Accents & English

Recently, I was chided when I did not talk “Inglish” to a white person. I wonder if such people know how Indians are perceived by most of the other parts of the world.

This post by AP Lawrence is a classic example. As an Indian I am offended by the “No India” option but at the same time, I wonder if people working in the customer service industry can put in a little more effort.

In fact, here I must pen in my experience with CS here. I was phonebanking. I clearly chose English as my choice of language. The customer support officer could not understand a word of what I said and distinctly had spoke english with tones of tamil… eg., “transfera?!” She could not understand simple banking terms.

Another time, I called some one in the US. Spoke in English the whole while, and he in the end had to send me some documents over for me to look at and sign up. He asks me if I knew English! I responded saying I did and was wondering what I was communicating in so far?!? May be he was wondering if I knew how to read! Benefit of doubt 😀

I know many take pride in talking “Inglish” but if we as a country want more business as outsourcing points, at least those sectors must get themselves trained in English. I suppose they are; but old habits die hard right?

Anyways, why do I let go off “Inglish” is simply because I was tired of repeating when others say pardon, excuse me… Good if I can get the other person to understand in the first go, right? To me the key to any language is communication. If one could get the other one to understand without accents – well and good!  Though I wonder if it is possible over the telephone, where accents get accentuated. Sign language works too 😉  Again not possible over the phone unless you are video conferencing 😀

Stereotyping &

This has been in my drafts for a really long time.  I was just waiting for my aunt to send me the pictures to post along with this.

I never liked stereotyping but as I am experiencing some things off late, I now understand the reasoning behind it.  Though some border around ridiculous. There was this one time when I was talking to some one in the US ( back in those days 🙂 ). I distinctly remember this conversation because it made me wonder. Is this how people still think of India? This lady I was talking to had this weird impression that elephants roamed around on the streets of India. The typical elephants, snake charmers image. It also made me wonder how ignorant she was. Of course, I was polite enough to just tell her that things were not so …blah blah… Yet in the back of my mind I kept thinking that this was weird! 

Anyways, on that note, I wanted to say that after close to 2 years and immense effort, I finally showed an elephant to A! 🙂 On my trip to Tirunelveli late last year, we went to the Nellaiappar temple. There I was told not to take any pictures. Then how do I now have pics to post? Well, money talks. One could sit on the elephant and go on a ride in the corridor for a price. The mahout said, give me a little more money and you can take pictures too. So, there you go! 😀 A glimpse of the elephant in the temple. 

  

By the way, the one other time A might have seen an elephant would have been at the Bronx zoo. Though I have a feeling he took a nap just around the time we were near the elephants. 

So much for being in India the land of elephants supposedly roaming on the streets!!! On a parting note, I am yet to see a snake charmer in all these years I have lived here!!! Hmm….next post? May be I should make a field trip to go in search for one now that A’s school is on summer break till mid June! 😉

 

PS: I am sorry that I have not been very active on the blogosphere due to various circumstances. I know that that is just an excuse…pardon me. Hope to get back to commenting and replying to comments – get a semblance of normalcy in my life too that way! 🙂