What stops us?

It is obvious like a huge neon sign right up in front of you. Yet, you hesitate to take that decision. Though here I am talking about knowing that taking that plunge is wrong for you….and yet you go do that. What stops you from not going there?

It can be something as inconsequential as unfriending someone on Facebook or deactivating that account. May be it can be as life changing as leaving a marriage, quitting a dead-end job…

Can all this just be generalised to not rocking the boat or “comfort zone”? All agree that change is inevitable, yet all of us resist change (of any kind…sometimes even when we know it is good! ) What stops us?

This is one of the major topics that I have been mulling over. Yes, it is in continuance to my previous post. I am not sure I am taking the right decision. Wise people around me are divided. My intuition tells me that I am doing it all wrong…. Gut instinct says it is the path to disaster (rather feel it is disastrous not just to me but also to my dear son!). These thoughts are making me irritable, depressed, anxious. Certainly not a good place to be in.

I am actually tired of thinking of pros & cons of everything. Unfortunately the fear of what is going to happen is making me think of all that already has. People ask me to move on. I wish I knew how, because basis of what is happening is my past. Every time I see my son, I am proud of what he is & wish the best for him for the future….but he does remind me of our past! I wish our memories were like a computer & a mere shift-del would just delete everything.  There are times I wish I were spiritual and I believed that everything happens for a reason, there is a bigger plan, good-bad karma et al. I am not…. I am not an atheist but I definitely do not believe in all that!!!

Whatever it is, I am in the state of constantly saying I just don’t know and that I am tired of life. More than ready to give up.

I do not want to hear be strong because that will only make me scream! I also do not want to hear how there are so many people who are worse off than me….sorry for them, but that really does not help in any way. Oh yeah, the cliché this too shall pass, yeah I know it will; my question is when and where will this stop?! If someone has an answer to that….then feel free to drop that in a conversation! I understand that I will be told I am not ready to be helped, or I am being rude. Well if it is so, so be it!  Yeah…times I wish something stops these “comforting” words to stop….for some reason they don’t!!!

My woes!! yeah I know…

A post after a really long time & it is a rant!! *sigh*

2 weeks back I went for my vacation with A to Thailand. Yeah good times :). I make a purchase with my “international” credit card. Things are fine. Go to another shop, extend my card, it gets declined!!

I call customer service, they say it is Sunday and they would forward a mail to the concerned department. I should be able to use the card the next day & I could try that evening. I try the next day & yeah, it gets declined again. Again called customer service, mail forwarded again.

I was told I had to inform the bank about my travel. I am like I have a valid passport, I get a visa on arrival even. So I cannot assume a VISA credit card will work without problems!! I have to call & inform them prior.

Fast forward a week, I try use the card for buying an app, it gets declined (my default card for payment was this!!). Didn’t think much of it, I forgot & used the card to pay for petrol……Oh yeah!! declined!! I call, furious to hear they will forward the mail  to the concerned department!!! 2 hours is the turn around time for this kind of request apparently.

Today I use the card. Yup….declined. Again call. Again the personnel says she will forward the mail!! I ask for the manager, she says usually card gets declined on suspicious activity.  (FYI: There are countries where CC fraud is rampant & banks do take precautionary measures I am told – Sri Lanka, Thailand are a couple like that!) I asked if she was aware of all the previous calls, whether they had a log maintained. She then asks for time. 4 hours now. She is going to call me to let me know my card is activated or what the status of the card is. I told her I need an explanation about what happened the last 2 weeks & all those mails that were forwarded!!

So my woes (yeah isn’t that why this post is being written?! :D)
Why must we inform the bank when we supposedly have an international VISA or MASTERCARD?!? This particular bank’s policy (btw, it is an international bank too!!! – your right partner 🙂 ) I am told. I said fine, I will accept the block…but what about the unresponsiveness even after calling & asking for the activation. 2 weeks & an escalation right now!!!

Next, this particular phone-banking service gives you the mini credit card statement of how much credit balance you have, what you owe, when the due date is at least twice!!! In this particular case, all I wanted was to talk to an executive to get this sorted not listen to my statement and twice at that!!!! Why not have an option in the IVR to ask if we need a statement if we are calling for that?!

Wondering if I need the hassle of such a card!! Guess I have not learnt the lessons!! 🙂
Oh I must mention here, that all my other cards worked (knock on wood!! hope I am not jinxing it) without informing the respective banking institutions.

PS: I guess I probably am the only fool who has a credit in the credit card account!! (would be great to know if there is anyone else out there like me!! 🙂 )This thanks to listening to my mini credit card statement each time I called!!! Just made me more furious.

I need anger management!!! Or we need a revamp of the customer service system here in India! Guess the former is more feasible & would get a better result! (I can almost picture people who know me really well grinning & not agreeing 😉 )

Lesson learnt: Whether you inform your family or manager or not about your travel; don’t forget to call your bank to let them know your itinerary!!

I am a divorcee!

Yes I am a divorcee… I am not proud of it or anything. It is just a fact. I don’t know why I must hide or be ashamed of that? It happened…and here I am. I have my life ahead of me. It did not end there, did it?

Why must people “advise” me to not divulge this? It is not like I have committed murder, I am not a paedophile or any such thing to be secretive about this. The number of people who said…you are going to a new job…Don’t tell anyone that you are divorced. Just say that your husband is abroad!!

What is the reasoning behind this?! Should I be ashamed that I could not make my marriage work? That I am a single mother who has resorted to living with her parents?

I feel that those guys who assume that since I am a divorcee, I will be ready for flings & hit on me shamlessly should be the ones who must follow restraint. Those who box me into some stereo-type…

Why can’t I just let be? Why must I lie? Sick & tired…these are really the things that pain me about my divorce…. Grow up all!!

My woes with a service provider

I write here after so many months only to rant! Sorry …but I have had it till here (wherever that is 🙂 ) with a certain network that says one needs every kind of friend. Seriously to deal with them, one does need every friend!!!

I must say I have been battling with a few issues for quite some time now…say almost since I stopped posting here. Currently have 2 issues running.

Let me start with the older one. I have my broadband service from this network. Till sometime now, I have been living in the city :Chennai. Suddenly the network decides that I live in Kanchipuram. According to them, my pin code(zip) falls into Kanchipuram. Been hitting my head against brick walls saying the city is Chennai, may be the district is Kanchipuram. I guess all this struggle started around September?! Anyways, long story cut short – I have been getting etiquette lessons about how I must speak even if I  am the frustrated paying customer who gets no resolution to the issue (though after every phone call, get a text message saying issue resolved!!!)

Point to note: One phone call I received enquiring about this from the network. The guy asks me to explain everything!! I asked if they every maintained any logs of calls!!! Frustration mounts if you have to explain each time about the issue & the history! I asked him sarcastically if Kanchipuram was Chennai. He goes I don’t know I am from Gurgaon. Told him don’t care if he were from Timbuctoo but I needed the correction done on my bill (which can be produced as proof of address for any official purpose). He does not even bother to cover up he tells his colleague in Hindi that I speak too much! I responded back in Hindi saying anyone would if they went through what I do to get my address right! He continues to his colleague “yeh madrasi hindi janti hai!”. Limits! And these people teach us phone etiquette!!!!

After calling, mailing, tweeting; I have given up. So according to my broadband provider the city on my address should read “Kanchipuram” –  a  town I probably have visited twice in my lifetime so far!!

My second issue. I got a gift of an iPhone4S (yay!!). Well not so fast to celebrate. To use it, I need a microSIM card. I call the relationship manager of the network that I deal with at work and ask him. He said he would get it to me that day… which went on for more than a week. I gave up, went to a private mobile store; got my old (one I used since 2008) SIM card laser cut. I call the network to make changes to start using 3G.

10 December: I get a call congratulating me on my phone. Tell me about plans for my usage. Then when I said the network drops, am told the issue is with the card and I would receive a brand new one by Tuesday that week. She would also call me on Wednesday to follow up and find out if it worked fine?!

14 December: Evening after waiting, not receiving card nor call, I call them. They say they tried to reach me and I was unreachable. They tried once. I had given them an alternate mobile number which also uses the same network!!

15/16 December: They call me once each day while I was entering a meeting or was in one. I tell them a time to call, I never get the call.

Fast-forward to 20th: Still no microSIM from the network. I call. They had closed the previous call and start a new one.

No calls from them… 21st I try cust care from my iPhone. I cannot reach them at all.I use my other mobile, tell them this…they assure me I will get a call back in 15 minutes around 4:20 PM.

22 December: 10:30AM no calls. I call using my other line, to be assured I will get a call back in a few minutes (I must have asked what their few minutes was specifically!) Around 4- 4:30Pm, lo behold I can call from my iPhone4S. I ask what happened. There are no records of calls made on 21st & 22nd!! The whole process of issue/history starts! I lost it. Told them I have lost hope that I would ever receive a microSIM from them, not now, not in this century or even next!

Supposedly I was told that my network drops because of faulty old SIM card but I cannot get it replaced. So, do I suffer with the faulty network stuck with “amazing” customer service (btw, I am told by the mechanical voice when I call customer service that I am welcome to their Platinum service!!!).

I am sure that they would have “resolved” the issue according to them. I am stuck with lousy network services which will be blamed on my SIM card making me wonder why I ever got a phone like this (which by the way is a pleasure to use!!)

In conversation with a friend, we were saying may be we must stop paying our bills and then may be they will call us!?!?! If we as prompt paying customers get this service, GOK what others are provided with?!?!

I must say one thing these people have made me do is get back to writing on the blog! Wish it were on a happier note and not such a rant!