OMG!

It has taken me a while to realise that I was in such a dead end marriage…living life as a doormat. Not that my position has improved greatly…but hoping it would soon enough. Why this post then? Well, off late, I have been told by some friends of mine; rather hinted upon that the one person I want out in my life might come back maybe (as he has not yet filed for the divorce! their ideas…), repent for his ways and I should accept him – for whatever reasons.

True, at one point, I would have done anything to stay with him. Now though, I am pretty clear. I want him out of my life and A’s. Any suggestions otherwise just infuriate me.

Don’t quite know why such things even come up especially from some who know every bit of what has transpired to the demise of my marriage. Is it Indian mentality? It took a lot out of me to get out of the trap mentally. It pains me to go through all these ideas of how he might come back, how I must forgive & forgetΒ  and all that!!! Sheer agony! So…please stop! Now all I want is to get on with life with my son.

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Don’t bother about others!!

How many times would we have heard the title told to us by different people at different times? One should have heard variations of that statement…
Can one really do that though is my question! Take what appeals to you and leave the rest that hurts ?! Is it that easy?
To me personally, I can do neither. Both appreciative and insensitive remarks affect me…the latter more so πŸ™‚
How can someone ignore other people or their remarks?? We do know that man is a social animal πŸ™‚ Don’t live by what the society says they say…but don’t we live in the same society?? Catch 22?!? We form the society we say…but there are so many different opinions…which ones should we listen to, react and the question is can we really ignore what does not appeal to us?
There might be people who have mastered that art…I certainly am not one of them. I fret about everything said about me…especially those not so appealing (for me that is πŸ˜‰ ) comments. I wonder if I can change something or try justify my position. Am I wrong? Or should I start getting answers ready for why I am right?! πŸ˜‰
I know I cannot change overnight…but one thing I am trying is to not let comments affect my life (which itself is a task – mind you!) Hope I can get to a comfortable place soon!!
As a plaque at home says “LORD Grant me patience but HURRY!” πŸ˜€