My woes with a service provider

I write here after so many months only to rant! Sorry …but I have had it till here (wherever that is 🙂 ) with a certain network that says one needs every kind of friend. Seriously to deal with them, one does need every friend!!!

I must say I have been battling with a few issues for quite some time now…say almost since I stopped posting here. Currently have 2 issues running.

Let me start with the older one. I have my broadband service from this network. Till sometime now, I have been living in the city :Chennai. Suddenly the network decides that I live in Kanchipuram. According to them, my pin code(zip) falls into Kanchipuram. Been hitting my head against brick walls saying the city is Chennai, may be the district is Kanchipuram. I guess all this struggle started around September?! Anyways, long story cut short – I have been getting etiquette lessons about how I must speak even if I  am the frustrated paying customer who gets no resolution to the issue (though after every phone call, get a text message saying issue resolved!!!)

Point to note: One phone call I received enquiring about this from the network. The guy asks me to explain everything!! I asked if they every maintained any logs of calls!!! Frustration mounts if you have to explain each time about the issue & the history! I asked him sarcastically if Kanchipuram was Chennai. He goes I don’t know I am from Gurgaon. Told him don’t care if he were from Timbuctoo but I needed the correction done on my bill (which can be produced as proof of address for any official purpose). He does not even bother to cover up he tells his colleague in Hindi that I speak too much! I responded back in Hindi saying anyone would if they went through what I do to get my address right! He continues to his colleague “yeh madrasi hindi janti hai!”. Limits! And these people teach us phone etiquette!!!!

After calling, mailing, tweeting; I have given up. So according to my broadband provider the city on my address should read “Kanchipuram” –  a  town I probably have visited twice in my lifetime so far!!

My second issue. I got a gift of an iPhone4S (yay!!). Well not so fast to celebrate. To use it, I need a microSIM card. I call the relationship manager of the network that I deal with at work and ask him. He said he would get it to me that day… which went on for more than a week. I gave up, went to a private mobile store; got my old (one I used since 2008) SIM card laser cut. I call the network to make changes to start using 3G.

10 December: I get a call congratulating me on my phone. Tell me about plans for my usage. Then when I said the network drops, am told the issue is with the card and I would receive a brand new one by Tuesday that week. She would also call me on Wednesday to follow up and find out if it worked fine?!

14 December: Evening after waiting, not receiving card nor call, I call them. They say they tried to reach me and I was unreachable. They tried once. I had given them an alternate mobile number which also uses the same network!!

15/16 December: They call me once each day while I was entering a meeting or was in one. I tell them a time to call, I never get the call.

Fast-forward to 20th: Still no microSIM from the network. I call. They had closed the previous call and start a new one.

No calls from them… 21st I try cust care from my iPhone. I cannot reach them at all.I use my other mobile, tell them this…they assure me I will get a call back in 15 minutes around 4:20 PM.

22 December: 10:30AM no calls. I call using my other line, to be assured I will get a call back in a few minutes (I must have asked what their few minutes was specifically!) Around 4- 4:30Pm, lo behold I can call from my iPhone4S. I ask what happened. There are no records of calls made on 21st & 22nd!! The whole process of issue/history starts! I lost it. Told them I have lost hope that I would ever receive a microSIM from them, not now, not in this century or even next!

Supposedly I was told that my network drops because of faulty old SIM card but I cannot get it replaced. So, do I suffer with the faulty network stuck with “amazing” customer service (btw, I am told by the mechanical voice when I call customer service that I am welcome to their Platinum service!!!).

I am sure that they would have “resolved” the issue according to them. I am stuck with lousy network services which will be blamed on my SIM card making me wonder why I ever got a phone like this (which by the way is a pleasure to use!!)

In conversation with a friend, we were saying may be we must stop paying our bills and then may be they will call us!?!?! If we as prompt paying customers get this service, GOK what others are provided with?!?!

I must say one thing these people have made me do is get back to writing on the blog! Wish it were on a happier note and not such a rant!



Rant alert!!!!

This morning as I was getting ready for work, the TV was tuned into a regional news telecast. The news item was about a road accident. A truck (lorry here) had struck a family on a two-wheeler. The father and infant (4 months old) were in serious condition. The mother and the other kid (2.5 years old) died.

I felt sorry for the family…yes. Though what went through my mind and what made me write about this is “who really was responsible for this accident?” I don’t generally swear, but trust me when one drives in the roads of Chennai; even the most gentle person would be swearing! Driving, the roads, utter lack of acknowledgement to rules is pathetic to say the least. This is not about all that though. What hits one in the face is the lack of value for human life. No one bothers!

Two-wheelers – they are easy to buy, easy to use and in the city traffic – weaving in & out gives a fast means to travel. No doubt! Wearing a helmet is (or is my usage of tense wrong here and should it be “was”) mandatory. Very few actually wear one! It is weird to actually see people amused when I used to make A wear his the last 2.5 years that I have been riding on a bike here and taking him along. It supposedly is quite a sight to see a kid wear a helmet!!! Doesn’t that alone show how pathetic the value of human life is?! Or are we all born with hard heads?!!

Why do I feel so strongly that the truck driver alone is not to blame?! He might be speeding and that is wrong. Deaths occured. Why did a family of 4 travel on a two-wheeler? I am very sure that the woman on the pillion, the toddler nor the infant sported helmets. The man might have (a very slim possibility) worn one. The woman would have sat with both legs to one side (supposedly lady- like) holding the infant. The 2.5 year old must have been in front of the father who was riding. Why am I so sure this would have been the case? This is quite a common site all across the city! So, say the truck is travelling at a permissible speed, the father with 3 others precariously perched on the bike comes in front… what happens? Of course an accident! The guy cannot manoeuver his bike with all. The truck driver, even if he had applied the brakes, cannot make his vehicle stop in an instant! Is it right that the truck driver takes the blame cos he drives a bigger vehicle? cos truck drivers are stereo-typed to be rash in their driving?

I do not say that truck drivers here are saints. Their driving would take a whole new post or many!! I just want to say that people must take their safety into consideration. Wear helmets. I know all cannot afford a car or hire an auto (tuk-tuk). Why not use the public transport? The buses are subsidised, safer (to an extent, certainly more than loading on to a two-wheeler). It might be an inconvenience to start early to take into account the unreliability of the timings of buses but it definitely scores over losing one’s life!

Hope this incident is a wake up call to the police officials here to enforce stricter rules especially when it comes to the safety of children. Child seats in cars are not mandatory. They can sit in the front seat in a car. None of them wear helmets (those that are made to wear one are looked upon as exhibit pieces!!) Child safety on the roads of Chennai again would be another long rant post….

Enough of blaming the truck driver alone for irresponsible driving , blame the family for being irresponsible. I sympathise for their losses; but I cannot for once say they are not at fault!!!


As usual, I am just contemplating life, God, philosophies….

Saw this as

“Q: Why should we believe in God?
A: Because there are still some questions which cannot be answered by Google.”

Sulz‘ status message on facebook. Yes, I clicked on “like” 🙂

Though, I wonder when will God answer the questions. Would these remain questions forever?! Going back to what I wrote quite a while ago… God! Give me patience, but hurry!!

I wish I could share what is going on in this place called my brain. Alas I cannot really do that now and here! Though nothing much has changed. Nothing is clear. Still wondering when I can see through the haze and know what is ahead.

The past fortnight has been quite a journey. Have had my ups and downs. The ups were not so high, the downs were pretty bad. Had a breakdown one of the days and had to resort to leaning on a friend’s shoulder. Thanks N! He was amazing and had me smiling and laughing at the end of the conversation. All this when he must have been tired after a long day at work and an early start the next day. Things I put my friends through!! 🙂 Sorry guys and a big thank you!

I also learnt a big lesson. Do not trust everyone who claims to be a friend. (I know some of you there going…duh!! but I have major issues with trust. I trust anyone who says she/he is a friend and shows he/she cares!  Dumb me! )  They just get everything out of you and trample over you. As my son’s father used to say…I have been spoilt by the great friends I have! The one off case where the person is out to take advantage of you comes as a shock, worse when that person also mars your path! I mean go on ahead take whatever but do not put the other person down! I guess there are people of all kinds! Such people just makes me realise how precious the real friends I have made over these years are. I just wish the bad ones do not use “friendship” and give that a bad name!! I suppose a lesson my friend P says is finally seeping through…” hey Apar remember everybody has an agenda. Figure that out. Don’t get hurt like this. Most are like this, few are otherwise. The few would stay, the others will just get their work done!” It is so hard though to find people with agenda or what it is 🙂 Lots and lots of learning ahead I suppose.

When will I get enlightenment?! Need it badly to go through now looking ahead at a life with all the responsibilities of a single mother. (I find people ever so ready to point the finger at me for every teensy weeny mistake and say I am a bad mother) and increasingly lonely days. I am trying not to infringe on my friends’ time so that they remain my friends :D. I don’t know anything any more not that I knew earlier. Just a little more confused now.

I have not been blogging too often because I don’t want to keep penning down all this. I don’t even know if this makes sense to anyone who reads this. 🙂 Just some rants of a confused, lonely and beaten down person (this is not self-pity or anything…just a matter of fact). I hope to survive this and more that I will be facing. Now God…with the patience, just give me some strength to find happiness in the little things I have and that diminishes the lemons thrown in! I am thankful for what I have. I know I am luckier than many others in the world but I must say enough is enough. I can’t stand it any more. I have not been the lucky one (I have never had luck even in a lucky draw in FIFA – shows when you pick Barry as the player in a draw with ENG playing GER! or Slovakia as the team in another draw! Was told even if the team comes last I get something…and the team goes into the KO stages!!! 🙂 LOL! 🙂 ) I don’t want the riches of the world. I just want to go on without being pulled down or betrayed. C’est tout!

And then a few more…

My last post was about how people constantly keep telling me to move on when it comes to P and I really don’t know what else I must do to say “OMG! I am done with him!!!! I am not hanging about waiting for him!!” Must I print it out on the newspaper that I am over him?!, scream from the rooftop till my lungs explode?! Well, I am doing the least I can, declaring it here in my space. All I am waiting for is the paper that would end the relationship legally and nothing but!!!!!

Now that said and done….it is at least clear. The relationship is over clearly but what about those you think are still there, yet know that it is not the same. These people are there, yet they are not. Do we write them off the list saying they are out of your life or try to keep reaching out and getting hurt when there is no response?! Such people  range from new friends to those who had been really close that you have shown every single aspect of yourself and some in-between!!! Relationships are way too complex…any thing one does one has to analyse. I am so tired of that. Wondering have I done something wrong? Is that person mad at me? Did I unintentionally hurt him/her? Too many things to process for my non-existent brain 😀

Just a sunday morning rant. Hope things are as simple as making A laugh and brighten up the moment like only he can 😀 for me and for everyone around 😉

I need my space!!

I don’t know if you have come across people who just have this uncanny ability to be annoying. They are nice people but still have that quality about them. They just suffocate you and make you want to just escape, hide, run away?! You know that they are well meaning but still want to make you scream – “hey leave me alone, I need my space. ”

In the name of being a “friend”, one has to stand the torture of questions like “where are you?” “what are you doing now?” “Why are you not responding?!” and the likes. How can one get the message across saying it is up to us to respond or not without actually hurting the other person? These characters seem to be easily offended, think that we are insulting them just by asserting our space! I have not got the hang of handling this. I also don’t know if I ever would. If any of you out there has the experience, suggestions/advice welcome!! I don’t want to be rude but I don’t want to get bugged like this either!

This also got me thinking, why are people who I want in life not there? 😦 When every incident makes you wonder – if that person were there. Have imaginary conversations wishing them to be real. You wish for that person to be present who knows just when to leave you alone and when to invade your space – just that right balance.

Life is unfair!! As I have said before, God (if you are there!! ) find another target. I am tired of being your punching bag. Now I really deserve a break with some rewards for all the fun you have had so far!!!

Unlucky me!

For some reason I thought it has been quite a while since I posted. I checked…and my last post was just on June 13!! Not bad eh?

Anyways, I suppose this is going to be one random post. Lots of things brewing on my mind that I am thinking of penning down. First of all, reason for these infrequent posts and more infrequent visits to blogs (okay not visiting blogs I frequent 😦 ) – technical difficulties. We have 2 machines at home – my dad’s windows desktop and my macbook. I also had a 1.5 TB external HDD attached which was compatible to both. First my HDD crashed!!!! (Had A’s DVDs ripped and stored – all gone, his photos/ videos, documents, back ups!!! – A friend offered to recover the stuff and give it. Crossing fingers & toes!!). Then internet connectivity fails. Thought it was a problem with the network or the modem provided by the ISP – and after a week, they figured out everything is alright and asked us to check our desktop. The guy fiddled with my mac on his visit; my mac crashed!!!!!!! Then well, you guessed it right, my dad’s desktop crashed too!! So, 2 machines and nothing!! It was torture! Finally got my mac up. Still in the process of getting the Windows machine up. HDD must ask my friend about the status! So, now feels like having brand new machines with no data on them 😦 and no back up also!! Tragedy!!! 😦 Boohoo!!! 😦

At work, I tried to apply for a permanent position (I work as a temp now obviously!) I did not even get shortlisted for the skills test. The reason when I enquired to me sounds pretty ridiculous. Politics at play? Probably just my plain bad luck in life as usual I suppose!!

Did I say I was unlucky??!? Well, not really. I had booked for a Tata Nano. I did get an allotment! Woohooo!!! 😀 Thought that winds are changing. Signs of life turning around. I guess I counted chicken before they hatched!! I check and find that I would get the car in the last quarter Oct- Dec 2010. Waiting for a car for one and a half years having paid in full for it!!!! (It is a cheap car – still a huge amount to get locked up like that!)  I have cancelled my allotment. It would take a month to get the money back after deduction of booking fee – They had debited my account within 24 hours when I paid them! Thing that pissed me off, the guys who served me at the automobile dealer centre; did not even offer a seat for us (A, dad & I had gone!) Basic courtesies!!!???

End result: I am unlucky. I must be avoided at all costs; like the plague!!! May be I must avoid me -just wondering how?! I apologise for not visiting any blogs. Will get back on track asap! Did I not just say that I must be avoided?! Here I am saying I would visit making life tough for one and all 😉

Edited to add: I forgot to add – My bike (ok Nikhil scooter! 🙂 ) has been found to have a manufacturing defect. The petrol tank leaks. The speedometer & odometer stopped working. I am a fool who gave the bike with a full tank of gas to the mechanic!!

I also happen to have lost a gold chain (my mangasutra – forget the significance of the same. Don’t really care about that…..but at the rate of gold currently – it is definitely a huge loss!!!)  😦

All for an ID




Warning : rant alert!!!

Friday was a day that had me tired, desperate and fuming!! The last time I was in in India and I voted, was the first time I became eligible to vote. It was also the time when voter’s ID was not there! Later on, when it was enforced, I did apply. Even went to get the photo taken – just that the ID never came to me!! 

I left for the US, 8 years passed with me never here during elections and was here for very short durations wherein voter’s ID was not my priority in the list of things to get done. Fast forward to the present… I was told that I must apply for it from scratch (kinda now like how I am starting life from scratch 🙂 ) 

I registered in Jaagore. Filled in all the necessary details. Got to know I had to go to the Election Commission office at Ayanavaram (for those who don’t know where this place is – Join the club – I didn’t either 🙂 ). I go there with filled in forms, mighty pleased with myself thinking “wow! I will be in and out within minutes!!” Yeah right!! Government business and within minutes – I must have been doped! I was told I had the wrong form! So, the officer there gave me a new set of forms. I had to have photos too to stick on the forms. I had everything – or so I thought. Boy! was I wrong!! The officer looked through the papers and says “You need 2 proofs of address!” and rattles out a list of accepted documents. I had none of those (correction – have) Then secondary list rattled out -bingo! bank statement or passbook. Alas! I had to get back home and get the photocopy. 

So, last friday…I set out yet again. Same feeling. Now I have everything – The right forms duly filled in, photos stuck, 2 proofs of address. I even learnt the ward number (cos the officer kept asking that the other day!) I walk in with all confidence thinking job is done, may be I will throw in some shopping that day! She politely asked me which division was I in! Flabbergasted – I had no idea!! The photocopy of my parents’ ID also did not have the information she wanted. She directed me to another officer on another floor. I went, waited and asked. The lady was downright rude and said that was not even the office I had to be in. She was the deputy Taluk officer. She said I had to go to Ambattur (I had only heard of the place!). She gave me a number to call which was not working! I told her, she said that was the only number and that was that.

Continue reading “All for an ID”


Of  late, I have been wondering how one is so easily judgmental. It does not matter that all the facts are not known. From the limited knowledge, one just assumes and makes an opinion of another person. So much so, uses phrases like “I hate”.

I personally have always felt that “hate” is a very strong word. I don’t think I have ever hated anyone so far. Hope I never do. To every person, there are two sides. Condemning one because of what one hears is pretty extreme. I try see the goodness in most people. If I don’t know the person well enough, I just would hope that one has a reason for what one does. 

There are many who say “oh you must so hate P”. I want to say here that – no, I don’t hate him. I don’t love him but that does not mean I hate him. We had our differences. I thought we were sorting them out. For reasons known to him, he decided to call it quits despite having a kid. He, according to most of us, has made a bad choice. According to him, it is right. Only time can tell. Do I need to hate him? I don’t like the consequences of the choices he made on my life. I am left to pick up pieces that sometimes don’t even exist. 

The worst part of it all, is being judged. I am told I must not care. Repeatedly I say that it hits you hard at times. All these negative vibes. The ranting or the crying does not necessarily mean you don’t have a grip about the situation. It does not mean that you are weak or not so strong! 

Being told that there are people who are worse off than you does not make your pain go away. One could feel sorry for the other person it still does not make your troubles/worries disappear. I just feel it is mean to think “Oh I am better off than the other person whose troubles seem worse!” Each plays with the cards one is dealt with in his/her way. Advice welcome; whether it is suitable or not is for that person who is going through the situation to decide. Yelling or swearing or comparing does not help in any way. Percentages of who are worse off than you also brings forward who are better off than you – right? So, instead of feeling supposedly better, one  might feel worse too! 

It just boils down to how one gets so judgemental. Please do not unless you know every bit of the story from all angles. Do not decide to hate a person from what one hears. It is better not to have an opinion than to form the wrong ones. Am not going to say don’t hate , spread love. Though a little tolerance does go a long way. After all we are all here for this lifetime. Why not make it pleasant for all those around us? 

On the personal front, despite my rants; I am trying my damnedest to get somewhere. I still believe in love. I hope to write about more happy and positive happenings that I & A experience.


Reema had written this post on the issue of remarriage of widows, widowers, the attitude of  Indian society toward both. I agree to every single thing that she has written.

This post though stems from a different situation – an extension to what she has penned in already. From what I have heard and faced over the recent past; I should say that the attitude extends to divorced men & women too. In this day of rising divorces & broken marriages, I don’t know how many go through all this!

It is so easy for people to accept a man take on another wife while it is blasphemy if a woman thinks of the same. There are some who say, if it happens it is alright but don’t go looking for a relationship. A relationship went south once…so take care or live for your kid, get a career. Suggestions to forget one’s needs or replace them (one supposedly would be too busy to notice and when you do, you would be too old and it would be too late. Worry about it now – then the response Why are you thinking of something so far away?!? 🙂 ).  A woman is not strong enough if she looks for a partner – get a grip! is what one hears. You will be fine! Though it is absolutely acceptable that the man “moves on”, dates, finds a partner proactively!!

I am just reminded of Revathi’s Marupadiyum (Shabana Azmi’s Arth in Hindi) where the woman chooses to be single. The dialogue sticks out in my head now : the heroine says the woman has grown up being a daughter of some man taking that name, then she takes on her husband’s name, then the mother of her kids.

So, when ever will the woman live for herself and not be penalised for it? Let a single woman be; if she wants it that way, let a woman not take her husband’s name; if she wants that….and if a divorcee (well in India you are that…not single again!) wants to live alone – so be it or if she looks for a relationship…why not?

Personal choices have no place! Being judged by society, being stamped as whatever – will these ever stop?There are times when I think single women (widows & divorcees) make that choice because of the attitudes she may have to face finally. It gets to you – the society….even if you don’t want to care, at some point it does overwhelm you to resign yourself to fate!

If this is the plight of women in a city where most of the population is educated. I don’t even want to think of those in villages where “tradition” has its place! Poor women stuck in marriages where abuse is the norm (physical, emotional, sexual….)

I doubt if these prejudices would ever end! At least I don’t think they will in my lifetime. I don’t even think I am being negative here. I feel that I am being practical – cynical yes, but pragmatic! Here is to hoping I am wrong!

Next time, some one wants to say “get a grip!” , “stay strong” – Stop!! The woman probably is doing it already!!


I have always maintained that either God does not exist or is deaf.

Now I have proof that God is deaf!!

Sunday (that is tomorrow) is one of the holy days in the Hindu calendar. Especially for devotees of Lord Muruga (or Kumar in the north) here in Tamil Nadu. It is Thai Poosam.

So, what are the devotees doing? They have put up speakers like the one above (pic taken right outside my home). They blare music (supposedly devotional). They have set up a network all over the neighbourhood surrounding the temple nearby. This noise pollution started yesterday and will end tomorrow.

We complained saying we don’t approve of it when they came to collect donations for these “celebrations” The response – “It is only for a day!!”  Dad said well, it would not even take a day for us to go deaf with the speaker right in front of our home. Don’t even want to think of the plight of those living right behind that monstrosity! Though it does feel like we are the only ones complaining. Are we the over-sensitive ones in the neighbourhood?

Anyways, I have concluded God is deaf and people are stupid! If God were deaf, one should use sign language. Peace and quiet – more effective right?!May be everyone here thinks that only such a disruption would turn God’s attention here?!

Whatever it is – the answer to the existence of God, hearing capacities, stupidity of people around – result is that our sanity is being tested, hearing is going for a toss. Waiting for this to end! Well, there will be some quiet till the next event. Dreading election time!!!

Rant over!